What Happens in Family Law Court?

Dear Dr. Jim: My husband and I are getting a divorce. We have a 6 year old son and we can’t agree on any custody arrangements. We each have temporary restraining orders against each other. What do you think the court will do? Janet K.

You are now entering an arena where your lawyers are your knights and the Judge is the King. The judge may decide he wants more information before making a judicial decree, and he may send out a member of his, “round table” (a Child Custody Evaluator) to closely assess the entire situation and report back to him. Please be aware that the King (i.e. the Judge in our metaphor) will make the final decisions and issue a judicial decree, which you will have to follow or suffer fines, loss of custody or even jail.


In Family Law Court, which is part of the Superior Court system here in California, the most basic rule for everyone involved is, “in the best interest of the child.” Obviously the definition of what is, “in the best interest of the child” will be made by the Judge. When you go to court, you get Justice, which is in the form of a judicial decree from the Judge.

This jousting in court is very expensive. I recommend that you attempt mediation with a private mediator who may also be a listed Private Child Custody Evaluator. In this way, each of you retain control of the outcome and the expenses are significantly less than the court arena.

I was trained at UCLA in mediation and in Negotiation at Harvard University. I have aided couples come to terms they can live with as far as custody arrangements are concerned. It is far less stressful on the child and you always can come back to mediation if there are rough spots in the parenting plan. I have been trained as a Parenting Plan Coordinator by the Superior Court of Los Angeles, Family Law Court.

It is my hope that this information has been helpful to you. You may contact me through my website: www.drjim.org or by calling my office at 310-289-8118.